For Health & Well-Being
Feeling off, or strange? Noticing that the people you love are a bit touchy? Just about everyone in the world is experiencing mourning, loss, and a huge change. Have you noticed their collective reactions?
The research of Dr. Kubler-Ross’s Mourning Cycle has long been recognized by a variety of researchers and therapists as applicable to mourning, forgiveness, and change management. This cycle is built into human DNA. You do not have to be consciously aware of it. It automatically functions. Mourning, forgiveness, and change all deal with a significant loss. Fortunately, your movement/mind system has a built-in process to deal with it. Think of it as the “Human Loss/Change Cycle.” Being aware of it helps.
All human behavior is both physical and mental. However, most people have no idea of their need to deal with the physical/movement aspects of behavior. You might “feel” angry or depressed, even as you say, “I have the will to forgive, or be at peace; therefore, but you just can’t will it. Or, you may realize that you get an uncomfortable “zing” every time you think about “the incident.” You might even realize that stress reactions are making your head, stomach and/or back ache. This cycle is a psychosomatic (mind-body) event and not just “all in your head.” This is not a time to “suck it up, and get on with life.”
The physicality of the Loss/Change Cycle is real and is caused by your bio-electric, neuromuscular, movement-mind link. Moreover, the physical and mental are one at your deepest core self.
Since 1971, I have developed Coordination Pattern® Training and Dynamics which among other concepts shows the connections and how to use knowledge and physical exercises to support people experiencing this Mourning or Loss/Change Cycle. It also explains how physical, habituated stress reactions can get locked into the body, prevent or stop the progress of the Cycle and how this type of block can be released. These blocks cause physical injury, high tension and more.
The basic connection of the Loss/Change Cycle and the Coordination Patterns can be essentially stated as:
- Denial – Hang Pattern: go with the free-flowing movement; letting go, random, intuitive, Tai Chi, improvisation
- Anger – Thrust Pattern: press, strike, force movement; “do it,” sensing, Karate, Hip Hop
- Bargaining – Swing Pattern: back and forth, interactive, playful movement; feeling, Hula, Belly Dancing
- Depression – Shape Pattern: placed movement; formal, correct, thinking, Yoga, Ballet
Acceptance uses all four Patterns. Each one of us has one of these four Patterns as our “home” Pattern, which is the Pattern of our relaxation, awareness, creativity, and alpha brain waves. Thus, it dominates our style of forgiveness.
Use these Patterns to support your Loss/Change Cycle process during this challenging time.
You will become healthier both physically and mentally if you do. There are also easy exercises that can be used to help, but for now “wiggle, giggle and play every day!”
You can also do pretend Tia Chi, Karate, Ballet and Hula. Or you can listen and move to Bobby McFerrin for Hang, Stravinsky’s Rite of Spring for Thrust, Beethoven’s 9th for Shape, and Aloha Oe Hula music for Swing. They can all be found on YouTube.
Betsy Wetzig, Founding Director of Coordination Pattern® Training & Dynamics